Archive for the ‘Personality’ Category

After years of a mediocre online presence I have grown sick of myself.  I don’t think it’s related to what I write, what I post, my political leanings or any of those common topics that make an online persona what it is.  I don’t think it’s my online persona per se.  I am just sick of myself, in all areas of my life, online and off.  So, with some hesitation I will be removing all of my various blogs over the next few days to weeks.  I may re-emerge in some manifestation but at this point I could not tell you what that manifestation will be.  I blame recent life events for this identity crisis, as I’ve labeled it.  I no longer really know who I am or who I want to or should be.  Some things will never change and that is my dedication as a father.  I will always love my children with all of my heart and will never cease to be everything that they deserve.  To be honest, my children are, what I consider to be, my one saving grace.  Loving them, and being loved by them, has made some pretty tough situations survivable.  However, every other aspect of who I am is fair game. It’s time to make a change, for better or worse. I don’t really know if anyone reads this blog anymore but if there are any passers by, farewell…  Thanks for stopping by.  Maybe our paths will cross elsewhere in the future.

K

My last class in my MBA program was “Leadership.”  While working through the course, it was amazing how many parallels I found with psychology.  It really makes sense when you think about it.  Psychology is the study of human behavior and leadership is when a person acts in a way to get others to work together to accomplish a common goal.  In order for a leader to be successful, they have to be aware of their followers’ behavior and how they can modify that behavior to meet the organization’s needs.  We look at behavioral (operant) approaches as well as coercive approaches to leadership.  Interesting…..to saythe least.  Obviously the course was much more in depth than what I have written here, but the parallels are obvious.  My advice for those who are in leadership roles, or wish to someday be in a leadership role, is to learn as much as you can about psychology.  Understanding why people behave the ways that they do can help to offer solutions when trying to alter that behavior.

Have parents today become so afraid of losing their children that they totally ignore all rules pertaining to parenting?  Are mothers so fearful of the fact that their daughters won’t be their “friend” that they essentially support deviant behavior.  For example, for the last 30 minutes I have been listening to a conversation between a mother and daughter that is happening in the next room.  The daughter, who is approximately 19-20 has been talking about boys non-stop.  She has been talking about juggling boys, dumping boys, being dumped by boys and future boys.  This girl clearly has a problem being alone.  As soon as she breaks up with a guy, or a guy breaks up with her, she has someone else.  If I were her mother, which I am obviously not, I would be telling her to take it slow, not to worry about finding a guy, because it will happen when you least expect it.  I would tell her to focus on herself during these young years and establish yourself and do all of the things that you want to do.  Instead I am hearing the mother encourage this conversation.  I hear the mother thriving on the gossip just like as if her daughter were talking to her college roommate.  Now I know there comes a time when you need to let your children live their lives, make their decisions and suffer the consequences of their actions but as a parent it is also your responsibility to educate your children and protect them, no matter what age they are and I find it disturbing that you refuse to act as a parent because you are living vicariously through your children and because you would rather be their friend than their parent.

Personalities – Part I

Posted: June 18, 2006 in Personality

I have done a lot of thinking about people's personalities.  I work with  a number of people who have very strong, not necessarily desirable, personality traits.  The approach I have taken is in no way scientific, but it is funny.  I given each individual a label.  They are labeled as an animal that they act like.  For example, I labeled my father, who is also my boss, as a blow-fish (puffer-fish).  I find this to be a very suitable label for him.  When he gets mad, or threatened in some way, he sucks in his breath and becomes very blustery.  I actually visualize him puffing up.  He then rants and raves until he wears himself out.  He threatens to fire people.  He threatens to retire.  He actually once threatened to fire everyone and retire.  I don't know how that would solve the problem.  The thing is, like a puffer-fish, he is all show.  He is a big wind bag.  A blowhard if you will.  He never follows through with any threats and he is essentially (what many may call) a sweet lovable teddy bear who would do anything for any of his employees.  I then thought back to my childhood to see if this trait was characteristic of his parenting.  It was.  He could be loud at times, putting me in my place.  He would wag his finger at me like noone's business.  He really was a good finger wagger.  He got so much speed on that thing sometimes that is was just a blur.  All of these acts were just for show.  Although at the time I thought he was a formidable character, I look back now and realize he was just "puffing up" in order to stand his own ground and keep the attackers (me) at bay, which is the motivation behind a real puffer fish inflating themselves.